Probably one that would make our parents blush! Well, for a good number of us it is…

This is how I see it… when my grandparents got married it was for life. She took care of the house and children, and he did the “man-ly” thing and went to work. Men were strong and women nurtured. Through thick and thin they stayed together and to be honest, I think my Pa is a saint for hanging in so long! But that’s what they did; they saw the vow of marriage as this sacred contract that couldn’t be broken. Absolute loyalty! Only one partner for the rest of their lives and sex was not talked about… ooo, that would be a dirty word…

By the time my parents got married the women were forced into the workforce yet still being the nurturer of children, and men were encouraged to “feel” their emotions and be more nurturing. Divorce was starting to become an option for those who weren’t happy with their first choice, enabling them to go out and find someone else who was more “right” for them than the last. Sometimes 2 or 3 times! This was frowned upon by the generation before them who were still waiting for “until death do us part” to kick in! And sex was a topic that some people talked about and others, with more traditional views, didn’t.

Now it’s my time and it’s more about focusing on our own happiness, so if we’re not happy we cut our losses and move on. Men are now SNAG’s (Sensitive New Age Guys) and some have more PMS then us women! Women are finding their own power and are asserting their wants, needs and desires. We’re also in a time where sexuality is ok to talk about, and we’re almost encouraged to explore it… I say almost… there is still some “taboo’s” to break through…

In the 60’s they went through a “hippy free love” period which was an all-in affair; sharing is caring sort of thing… which in some ways pioneered the whole sexuality exploration era (is there such an era?? bugger it, there is now!) It’s been an ongoing evolution since then to the point where even though some exploration is still considered “taboo”, it seems like there are a great number of people exploring! Go figure!

So in the 21st century, just to recap and get to a point, women and men both work, marriage is not necessarily the done thing and if it lasts more than 10 years then you’re doing well! Sex is a big part of the relationship and in some, what makes it or breaks it! We are exploring our sexuality, which for a lot of people is their “bisexuality”… we have a plethora of ideas, toys and paraphernalia to assist us in having great sex, and many couples are now seeking other ways to both explore their sex life and have fun doing it!

For some it’s engaging in role play, having sex in different places, different positions, using toys, watching porn, or for some it means bringing other people into their sex lives to live out the dreams and fantasies that they can’t do with just their partner. How do you have a 3some with just 2 of you? And how do you explore bi-sexuality with the just opposite sex?? Toys are only good to a point and for some, that’s as far as they want to take it, for others they want to try the real thing and does it matter? Hell no!

Now my grandparents, and I’m pretty sure my parents, would think there was something wrong with the relationship, and me for that matter, to be out there swinging around, lol… But you know what? The 21st century is all about self discovery; finding out what is right for you, challenging traditions that were passed down for the sake of passing them down and working out what is relevant to you in this era. So if you’re exploring your sexuality; deciding what is right for you and your partner, then I doubt lightning is going to strike you down! Besides, if you’re both consenting adults, who cares? Get out and be who you are, discover and explore, try something new… your sex life will thank you…

If you want to check out more about this whole swinging caper, check out my book “The Ultimate Swingers Guide“, it will be an eye opener but it’s a great how-to guide if you decide it’s for you. Until then…

Here’s to your sexual evolution!