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Who Is Rach Wilson?

Chantelle Austin International's Specialist Coach & Mentor in Non-Monogamy and Open Relationships Internationally

Sleeping Around and Staying Safe

Sleeping AroundWhen it comes to sex, the more the better right? Right. So if more is better, what’s the easiest way to get as much sex as you can handle? Having multiple partners. Whether you’re in college and having fun, dating a few people in your twenties, or kicking it as a swinger, having multiple partners is a completely acceptable way to approach your sex life. However, having sex with multiple people (whether separately or all together) can also pose some major health and emotional risks. Use some of these tips to keep you and your partner(s) safe.

You’ve heard it since you were 18 years old, but that doesn’t mean it always sticks. If you’re sleeping with several people, you need to use a condom every. single. time. Birth control pills and IUDs are great for making sure no one gets pregnant, but they don’t protect you from getting STD’s. Don’t trust your partners when they say they are clean. The people who are quickest to say it or get weird about using protection are usually the ones you need to look out for. Be open, be honest and be safe. Keep condoms with you at all times, because no one is more responsible for your health than you.

One time in college, I managed to sleep with two different guys in one 12 hour period. It has forever reigned as the beginning of my sexual awakening and it was awesome. I never told and the guys never knew and it’s because I made sure to do ample cleaning up in between. If you’re planning on hitting it with someone in the AM and another at night, be sure to take the time to shower and clean their bodily fluids off of you. It’s respectful to the other person and lowers the chances of spreading disease, bacteria and germs.

Toy Usage:
I’m a toy girl. I love them with myself and with others. I feel like I’m always going to Adam and Eve to pick up a new one; it’s just the way it is. If you’re a toy person, too (whether you buy and use regularly or are a one off), you need to be sure to take the proper precautions when sharing your toys. While they are great to use with partners, you need to be sure that you clean them in between every use. You’re best bet is to have specific toys for specific people (if you have a few in rotation), vs having one or two and using them with everyone. Just like real genitalia, a toy can spread disease, bacteria and germs, so wrap it up and clean it often.

Get Tested:
Nobody eagerly awaits their STD results. It’s not like when you took the GRE and were dying for your score; you just want to get it, look at it and be done. Regardless of the lack of excitement, it doesn’t make it any less important. If you’re going to sleep with multiple people, you need to be responsible and get yourself tested on a quarterly basis. You can’t assume that you’re clean just because you’ve been safe. If you’re telling people your status (which you should), you actually need to know it. Get your ish tested on the reg.

Finally, if you’re going to juggle, you need to be open and honest about it. It is not fair to other parties involved if they are exclusively sleeping with you and you are not at all. You may lose some partners this way, but being honest keeps you from getting all of the negative terms people like to call others who sleep around and hurting someone. Be an adult, own it and talk about it often.

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