Creating rock-solid, freedom-based relationships where monogamy is optional…

Who Is Rach Wilson?

Chantelle Austin International's Specialist Coach & Mentor in Non-Monogamy and Open Relationships Internationally

How to End an Evening – A Handshake, a Kiss or Breakfast?

So the playing has finished, now what?  Make them a bed and take their breakfast order?  Offer a tea or coffee?  Walk them to the door and say, “thanks for coming”?  (Ha ha ha, thanks for “coming”… Anyway.)  And then how do you say goodbye?  Do you kiss them or shake their hands?  Well, you could do any of these; there are no rules on this one.

When it comes to coffee or tea, a bed and breakfast or just saying good-bye, it’s easiest to work it out ahead of time; if you’re the host, ask what they normally do and go with that or offer them some options that you’re comfortable with and allow them to decide.

When playtime is finished, we often offer coffee or tea and those that are willing to do that will stay; those who are ready to go home and head to bed will end up going.  You can always offer a bed for people to stay over in if you have one, if you don’t have the space for it, just let them know before the night so they don’t expect an invite to stay…  Or to just stay as some people do.

If you’re going to someone else’s house or hotel room, and they haven’t offered a bed for you to stay in overnight, assume that you’re going home, but be prepared with an overnight bag with toiletries and clean underwear (at the very least), and have an idea of what you might say if they offered it.  Oh and bonus if they cook you breakfast but don’t expect it!  NB:  If you have dietary requirements such as gluten free, pack some snacks or breakfast options, just in case.

When people leave, we escort them to the door and we often just kiss them goodbye, sometimes a quick peck and sometimes a full pash!  The boys tend to do handshakes, unless they’re gay/bi in which case it could be anything… And how I love anything… *lost in flashbacks*

Go with the flow and don’t worry, sometimes it may feel a bit awkward especially if it’s your first play with them, but as you play more often with the same people, it all becomes quite natural and easy.

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