That’s a good question… and I’m not really sure I have the answer to that one.
Chantelle and I had decided to venture into swinging and were exploring all kinds of fun and funky activities. Part of this was lots of discussion about all the things we wanted to try, and agreeing on what we wanted to add to our “Sexual Bucket List”.
From memory I don’t think there was anything Bi on that initial list.
But hell! Everybody loves you when your Bi!!!
Now, playing in close proximity to other men there is always a chance that there is some “collatoral damage” or accidental touching between men. Plus you get to see all the other guys equipment in action,
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September 17, 2011 at 5:26 am
Thank you for sharing your experience – it resonated with my own awareness.
I’ve often remarked flippantly to people that everyone is bisexual but jut too conditioned for it to be revealed. But I do believe there’s a level of truth.
In exploring my own sexuality I’ve come to realise that the sensual, sexual pleasure my body can experience is entirely based on my willingness to let go and allow the experience. It’s an easy test: when your eyes are closed what do you know of the source of a caress? The less we’re making mental associations the less it maters.
So on this basis, while I don’t (yet?) find myself being attracted to other men in the same way I do with women, surely I am completely capable of experiencing deep, vulnerable, intimate and sensual experiences with men or women?
The other thing that struck me (quite hard) was my general revultion for male sexuality. What was so hard about it is I realised that, being male, that’s what I must subconsciously think of my own sexuality. As I’ve explored my own sexuality and developed a curiosity and appreciation for my own body and its sensational experiences the revulsion has disipated. And slowly, slowly I’m developing a curiosity about other mens bodies as a mirror to further exploring and appreciating my own physical and sensual being.
A bit scary but exciting too.
October 16, 2011 at 1:05 pm
Touchdown! That’s a really cool way of putting it!
September 17, 2011 at 5:26 am
I feel the same way, my friend. While I’m interested in playing with guys, I don’t find myself saying: “wow, he’s hot…” instead, I tend to think, that might be fun to play with. I occasionally feel like Kinsey saying, I wonder what that’d be like…
I’m about to come out officially on my site: Life on the Swingset and am actually a bit nervous about it…
Fingers crossed no one dies!
September 17, 2011 at 5:27 am
I am facing similar issues.
Am happy to be in the lime light talking about sexuality and relationships but mixed into it all is some pretty personal, exposing and sensitive stuff. Admitting non-monogamy to ones extended family is as big a deal as coming out as gay was in the 90′s.
I don’t feel bad about myself or the choices I make but I do feel bad for others when their belief and expectation bubbles get rudely popped and they were not looking to have their equilibrium shifted so radically. It’s quite a different mater in the role of a coach were my role is very specifically to draw attention to the unconscious illusion.
Having played with the idea of using a pseudonym I decided not to on the basis that examples of my life experience challenging sexual and relationship norms is just one aspect to me of many. However yesterday I tried editing an article to make it less personally revealing and after some frustration realised just how vulnerable I was feeling.
So I’ve taken a hint from your site and will restrict access to articles – that simple hurdle allows for a gentle warning regarding the nature of the material.
Thank you for sharing your raw honesty.
October 1, 2011 at 6:34 am
Thanks for the share!
Nancy.R
October 17, 2011 at 2:03 am
I feel so much happier now I understand all this. Thanks!