Creating rock-solid, freedom-based relationships where monogamy is optional…

Who Is Rach Wilson?

Chantelle Austin International's Specialist Coach & Mentor in Non-Monogamy and Open Relationships Internationally

Choosing Your First Sex Toy – Tips For the Novice

Buying sex toys for the first timer or inexperienced is a pretty daunting task, especially if you don’t have anyone offering advice on what to try out first. It’s not like you can casually ring your mom or your sister and say, “Hey, I want to spice up my sex life with a vibrator, got any advice?”

If we stick with vibrators, there are plenty of decisions and choices that need to be made when choosing your first one, but put simply you need to consider the following:

    1. Size is perhaps the first thing you need to think about because using a dildo is pretty invasive (in a nice way of course!) so you don’t really want to be starting with a huge dildo if you’ve never used one before.You probably ought to go for something small and discreet to start with because that way you will feel completely in control and you can safely store you new little friend in your purse or bedside drawer.


    1. Shape is your next consideration because you need to decide whether you want a vaginal or anal dildo. If you’re looking at vibrators then it’s more about the sensation than shape or size and for starters, you’re probably better off getting a vibrator.


  1. Material is important because you need to decide whether you want something that is realistic to the touch or smooth and cold. The most popular material is probably silicone because it is easy to clean and it can be cooled or warmed up quickly.

Size, shape and material are all very well, I hear you say, but what products should you be looking for? There are literally thousands to choose from so where do you start?

We could discuss options for days on end, but the safest option is probably to go for something small and perhaps to start with a vibrator rather than a dildo.

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